


I'm Not Mine To Give

by donsboy



Category: CSI: NY
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt/No Comfort, M/M, Misunderstandings, Multi, Threesome - M/M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-15
Updated: 2015-08-26
Packaged: 2018-04-14 19:20:00
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,297
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4576668
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/donsboy/pseuds/donsboy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jackson deals with wanting something he can't have.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> * * *
> 
> This is finally finished! I'd like to thank everyone who stuck with it to the end

            Jackson sat at the water’s edge, looking out over the lake. He was going over the conversation he’d had with Don just as his shift was ending. The more he thought about it, the sadder he felt. Tears threatened to spill over at any moment, but Jackosn really didn’t care at that point. All he wanted was to find a way to ease the pain.

 

            Jackson had thought long and hard about confessing his feelings to Don. In the end, he decided to just go for it, consequences be damned. Now, in the aftermath, he wished to God he’d kept quiet. Don had asked him to meet him at the precinct when his shift was over, and that's when thing fell apart.

            Jackson made his way to Don’s office. Don was on the phone, but motioned for Jackson to enter. He sat down in one of the chairs in front of Don’s desk and waited for the man to finish his business on the phone…..

 

"Thanks for seeing me on such short notice, Don.....”

“ Would you mind closing the door?”

 

Jackson rose from his seat and did as Don asked…..

 

“Jackson, I’ve been keeping an eye on you lately from afar, and I’m becoming a bit concerned…..”

“Why are you concerned, Don?"

“You seem preoccupied, and you just aren’t the same Jackson that I've come to know. Why is that?”

 

“Don, I could lie and say it’s nothing, but I won’t. I’ve had something on my mind for a while, and it’s time I got it off my chest.”

“I’ll be glad to help if I can, Jackson…..”

“Here’s the deal….. I’ve had feelings for you for quite a while, and I’ve been afraid to say anything. I’ve never felt this way about anyone before, and I put a lot of thought into this, and I’ve decided that I think you should know how I feel.”

 

Don sat there trying to digest everything Jackson had just said. He had no idea that his friend felt this way about him. Part of him was flattered at Jackson’s interest. Now that he had confessed his feelings, Don knew that what he was about to have to do would most likely hurt his friend, but there was no way around it…..

 

"Jackson, please hear me out…..what I’m about to tell you is definitely not what you want to hear, but I must tell you. I’m flattered that you are interested in me, but I can’t return your feelings. You see, I can’t give you what you want because I’m not mine to give. I’m involved with someone, and have been for a while now. If I’d known about your feelings sooner, things might not be the same, but as you know, life isn’t something you can go back and do over. Please know that this isn’t personal….that’s just how things are. “

 

Jackson sat there feeling lost, embarrassed, hurt, and angry all at the same time. Tears of hurt began to fall, and he swiped them away angrily……

 

“Don, I apologize. If I had known, I never would have said anything…..”

“Jackson, you did nothing wrong. Your timing was just off, that’s all…..”

 

Jackson looked Don directly in the eye when he made that last statement, his heart shattering with every breath. It was all Don could do to sit there and see the hurt in Jackson’s eyes…..

 

“Jackson, I want you to know I’m very sorry about this…..”

 

Jackson stood, tears streaming down his face, walked over to the office door, opened it, and turned to look at Don and said, “Not nearly as sorry as I am…..”

 

To be continued.....


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Don and Mac talk about what happened, and Mac comes up with a solution..... Chapter 3 in progress...

Chapter 2:

 

Don sat at his desk for a few moments after Jackson left. He kept seeing the hurt in Jackson's eyes, and it bothered him because he put it there. He gathered his things and headed for home feeling low and a bit sad. When he arrived home, Mac was in the kitchen preparing dinner. He heard Don come in and grabbed a beer from the fridge to take to him. He knew immediately that something was wrong and sat down beside Don and asked if he wanted to talk about it.....

“I did something this afternoon, and I feel so bad about it, Mac....”

“What did you do, Don?”

“You know that guy Jackson that runs that Groovy Gold record shop in the Village?”

“The cute little guy with the curly hair that I buy my jazz LPs from?”

“Yeah..... he came by my office this afternoon and told me that he had feelings for me.....”

“What did you say. Don?”

“What could I say? I told him that I was flattered but I was with somebody else and that I couldn't return his feelings......”

“Did you tell him who you were with?”

“No, because it wasn't relevant to the conversation.....”

“I see.... If that's all there was to it, then why are you so down about this?”

“You didn't see the look on the poor guy's face when I broke his heart......”

Don was unable to continue because the tears he'd been holding back spilled over, and he had himself a good old-fashioned cry. Mac held him while he tried to re-gain his composure, his heart hurting for his lover. When Don was able to continue, he told Mac that he felt that he needed to make up for hurting the young man's feelings the way he did. Mac asked what he had in mind, and Don replied that he wasn't sure yet.

Later that night after Don had gone to bed, Mac sat in the darkened living room thinking about Jackson. He felt guilty in doing so, but if the truth were known, he had something of a crush on the guy. He'd had feeling for him ever since he'd gone into Jackson's shop looking for some jazz albums to complete his collection. He obviously never said anything to Don about it because he didn't want to cause a problem between the two of them. He began thinking about a solution that would possibly be satisfactory to everyone. As soon as he got all the details worked out, he would talk to Don and see what he thought about the deal.

The next morning, Mac told Don that he might have a solution to the Jackson problem. He didn't elaborate, he just said that he was working on the details and the he would fill Don in when he had everything figured out. Don was curious, but Mac told him that all would be revealed in time. Don knew better than to press the issue because the end result would be Mac clamming up,and Don would still be in the dark.

A few day later, Don found himself heading to the Village to see if he could talk to Jackson. It had been a few weeks since the incident in Don's office, and he wanted to see how Jackson was doing. When he arrived at the shop, he got nervous. What if Jackson didn't want to see or talk to him? Don guessed that was just a chance he had to take because he really wanted to see Jackson. As he made his way inside, he looked around for Jackson but didn't see him. He walked up to the counter and asked the clerk if Jackson was there. The guy asked who he was, and Don told him. The guy stood there for a minute then said; “You're the motherfucker that broke his heart! I'll tell him you're here, but I don't know if he'll talk to you.....”

The guy headed to the back and was gone for what seemed like an eternity. He finally came back and said that Jackson would see him. He led Don down a short hall and knocked on a door. Jackson opened the door and invited Don inside.......

“What brings you by, Don?”

“I wanted to see how you were doing.....”

“As you can see, I'm doing alright.....”

“Jackson, I'm really sorr...”

“If you start up with the “sorry” bit, you can leave now.....”

“But I really hate the way this all turned out.....”

“Why is it bothering you so much? You're not the one who made a fool of himself and embarrassed himself! You probably laughed all the way home that day because somebody you secretly thought was beneath you dared to tell you how they really felt. I bet you even told your partner about all this and the both of you had a good laugh at my expense!”

“Stop right there!!! I've never thought you were beneath me, and I never laughed at you. Yes, I told my partner but neither of us laughed about it. In fact, I cried over it, and he held me while I did so! I've done nothing but wonder about you and hope that you might be okay, but now I see that I was worrying over nothing. I'm sorry I even bothered to check on you. Good day, Jackson!”

 

Before Jackson could react, Don was up and gone. He sat there for a few moments going over the conversation he'd just had with Don. He knew it sounded harsh, but those things had to be said. He tried to put the whole mess out of his mind, but that proved to be impossible. He tried to turn his mind to work and other things, but Don kept coming to mind.

Don made his way home in a funk. His feelings were hurt because Jackson thought so little of him. He really did care for the little guy, just not the was Jackson wanted him to. He was miserable over the situation, and all he wanted was to be in Mac's arms, with Mac telling him everything was going to be alright.

When Mac arrived home, Don told him everything that had happened with Jackson. Mac consoled him, and told him that if Don wanted, he would try to talk to Jackson. Don replied that he didn't think it would do much good, but that he was welcome to try. The plan Mac had been working on started coming together in his mind. He didn't want to tell Don what he was thinking just yet because he wanted a chance to try and talk to Jackson.

Meanwhile, Jackson was thinking about Don's visit to the shop earlier in the day. He was thinking that maybe he'd been too hard on the guy. It really wasn't Don's fault that Jackson's timing sucked. After all, Jackson wasn't sure that Don knew he had a crush on him. That coupled with the fact that Don was already with somebody made Jackson feel even worse about the situation. He knew that he should apologize to Don for getting on his case like he did. Jackson knew his insecurity, hurt feelings, and bad attitude all conspired to make him make an ass of himself, which is exactly what he'd done. He just hoped that Don would be willing to listen to him when he tried to apologize.

 

The next day, Mac made his way to Jackson's shop. He decided to try and talk to Jackson and clear the air on Don's behalf. When he arrived, Jackson greeted him personally.....

“Mac!!!”

“Hello, Jackson....”

“What brings you down? Got a list for me?”

“Not this time..... I need to talk to you.....”

“Sure.... is something wrong?”

“Nothing we can't settle between us.....”

“I don't follow.....”

“Is there some place we can talk privately?”

“Sure, let's go to my office.....”

Once they were in the office, Jackson asked what was on Mac's mind.....

“Well, it's about the incidents between you and my partner, Don Flack......”

“Oh, God! Don's with you?”

“We've been together two years now.....”

“Jesus, Mac, if I had known......”

“Jackson, it's okay.... there was no harm done.....”

“Mac, you've been a loyal customer of mine for a long time. I feel as though I've disrespected you.....”

“I don't see it that way..... you had no idea that Don and I were together, did you?”

“I saw the two of you in here together a few times but it never dawned on me that you were an item.....”

“We keep it low-key..... anyway, I came here to ask if you would have dinner with Don and I so we could “clear the air”......”

“Are you sure that's a good idea, Mac?”

“I do..... let me talk to Don about it, and I'll call you so we can set it up.....”

“Sure..... you can reach me here at the shop.....”

“Sounds like a plan..... I need to get going, and I'll be in touch soon.....”

“Thanks for coming by, Mac.....”

 

Jackson sat there stunned. He had no idea about Mac and Don. Maybe dinner would be a good idea so he could apologize properly to Don for being such an ass about everything. He put the matter out of his mind for the moment and concentrated on work.....

 

Mac sat in his recliner thinking about his meeting with Jackson. Just thinking of the little guy stirred up all sorts of feelings for Mac, but he knew that he needed to be thinking about talking with Don and laying out his plan. The plan itself was simple: Jackson wanted Don, Mac wanted Jackson, and with a little persuasion, Mac felt that Don would come aboard. Now Mac knew that this was a serious deal he was proposing, and that once the plan was put in motion, and all parties agreed, there was no turning back. That's why Mac was trying to find the best way to tell Don about what he had in mind.

Later that evening, Mac found the opening he was looking for.....

“I went by and talked to Jackson today.....”

“Oh, yeah? Did you get the sharp side of his tongue like I did?”

“Not at all..... he was apologetic when he found out about you and I.....”

“Really?”

“Yes, and I took the liberty of inviting him to have dinner with us.....”

“When is this supposed to happen?”

“I told him that I would talk to you about it and let him know.....”

 

Don could tell Mac had something on his mind regarding Jackson. He didn't have a clue what it could be, but knew that he wouldn't have to wait long to find out.....

“What's on your mind, Mac Taylor?”

“Well, Don, it's like this: what I'm about to suggest doesn't mean that I love you any less. And I feel that when you think about it, it may be beneficial to both of us.....”

“Go on, Mac.....”

“Jackson has a thing for you, right?”

“Yeah...”

“And I have a confession to make: the thought of Jackson and you together turns me on. That coupled with the fact that I kinda have a thing for him, too.....”

Don let what Mac had suggested sink in. It really would make things simpler because Don had a secret of his own: He'd wanted Jackson all along! Trouble was Don didn't know how Mac was going to take that bit of news......

“I have a confession to make myself, Mac.....”

“And what would that be, babe?”

“I've had a thing for Jackson for a while now myself. I didn't say anything because I didn't know how you'd take it. I turned him down because I didn't want to cause trouble between us.....”

“Babe, you can tell me anything...... I wouldn't have been mad, and it sure as hell would not have been a deal breaker between us......”

“You're not pissed?”

“Hell, no! I think it's hot, Don! This makes things so much easier..... If Jackson's agreeable, we can all get what we want, and we could maybe make into something permanent, if that's what you want.....”

“But what about us, Mac? What about what you and I have?”

“Baby, the only thing that will change is the fact that we'll have someone to share our love with. God knows, we've got enough between us to share..... what do you say, Don?”

“If you think it will all turn out alright, then I don't see what it could hurt.....”

 

Later that night, Don lay thinking about adding Jackson to the mix. The idea excited him and made him a bit wary at the same time. He decided to have faith in Mac and see what happened......

The next morning, Don told Mac he would take care of talking to Jackson about dinner. Mac suggested Vinetti's on Thursday. Don thought that was a great idea, and said he would tell Jackson to be there about 8 o'clock. The two men kissed and went their separate ways. Mac was headed to the lab, and Don headed to Groovy Gold. When he arrived, there was no one there but Jackson. He entered the shop and headed to the counter.....

“Good Morning, Jackson.....”

“Hello, Don..... how are you?”

“I'm alright.....”

“Don, I'm glad you came by....”

“Why is that?”

“I wanted to apologize for being such an ass the other day. You didn't deserve any of that. I hope you can accept my apology.....”

“Consider it done, Jackson.... I came by because Mac said he spoke to you the other day about us getting together for dinner....”

“He did.... I was surprised, to say the least.....”

“How about meeting us at Vinetti's on Thursday, say 8 o'clock? Is that good for you?”

“That will be fine, Don....”

Before Jackson could react, Don leaned down and hugged him. When he got to the door, he turned, winked, and told Jackson he'd see him Thursday.

To be continued.....


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Don, Mac, and Jackson go to dinner with unanticipated results...

Chapter 3:

 

Jackson stood there for a moment after Don left the shop. He was thinking about Don hugging him and how that made him feel. He chalked it up to Don being friendly and tried to go on about his business. As he made his way to the precinct, Don thought about the hug too. Jackson had felt so right in his arms, but he knew he shouldn't think about that at the moment. He went by the lab to tell Mac that Jackson had accepted the dinner invitation. Mac was very pleased, and started thinking about the rest of his plan.

All of this had take place on Monday, and as Thursday grew closer, Jackson began to get very nervous. He wanted to have dinner with Don and Mac, but was afraid that he would embarrass himself somehow. He considered calling and canceling, but decided to buck up and at least find out what this dinner was going to be about.

Mac grew more excited as Thursday grew closer. He and Don had been doing some serious discussing about the two of them and what would happen if things worked out with Jackson. They decided that this felt right for both of them, and it was also decided that if Jackson accepted their proposal, it would be just the three of them. A committed threesome, if you will. Don did bring up a very valid point: what if they started this thing and it didn't work out? Mac stated that if things went south, he and Don would stay together. That relieved Don very much because he really did love Mac Taylor. He just hoped that things would go well and that he wouldn't have to hurt Jackson a second time.

Jackson was trying hard to go to sleep, but thoughts of Thursday kept swirling around in his head. He was looking forward to the chance of being able to apologize and have a nice dinner with two very good-looking men. Wait!!! When did he start thinking of Mac that way? True, he'd always though Mac was nice-looking, but now when he thought of the older detective, he felt stirrings much like those he felt for Don. Dear God, what had he gotten himself into?

Thursday found all three men very busy. Jackson was on the phone with distributors arguing over botched orders while Don and Mac were busy on cases. At lunch time, Don called Jackson to see how his day was going, and the two men commiserated on how things were going. Don reminded him of dinner at Vinetti's that night, and Jackson told him that he would be there for sure. As Don was ending the call, he said: “Great! I'm looking forward to it, babe.....” Before Jackson could say anything, Don had ended the call. First there was the hug, now he'd called him babe. What in gay hell was going on here??? Later that day, Mac dropped by the shop to see how things were going with Jackson. The two men talked for a few minutes and then Mac said he had to go. He shook hands with Jackson and his hand lingered a bit too long. This confused Jackson even more, but he kept quiet. Something was definitely going on, and he fully intended to find out what.

Dona and Mac arrived at Vinetti's shortly before 8. They'd been shown to their table and had ordered drinks when Jackson arrived. Mac saw Jackson first and couldn't help but gasp. Don heard him and looked over to see Jackson. He let out a low whistle because the little guy looked damn good. He had on a purple sweater and stone-washed jeans. The jeans fit his compact little body perfectly and showed his muscular ass to perfection. Don felt an erection coming on and discreetly reached into his lap to make it go down. He noticed that Mac was having a bit of trouble also. He nudged his partner and the two laughed.

Jackson joined them at the table and Mac ordered him a beer. The waiter came and took their food orders, and while they were waiting for the food, they talked quietly among themselves. Mac asked about Jackson's background, and Jackson gave him a brief synopsis: He left home at 16, and came to New York. He went to work at Groovy Gold and worked himself up to owner. He'd been by himself for the last 7 years because his lover decided to marry a woman.

Don and Mac volunteered information about themselves. Mac mentioned Claire and his work at the Crime Lab. Don told about his father being a cop, and his own work as a detective. Jackson asked how long Don and Mac had been together, and Mac said it had been a little over two years . The food arrived and the men ate their dinner, while the conversation flowed. Jackson was having a good time until the feeling came over him that there was more here that met the eye. When dinner was over, Jackson excuse himself saying the he had to get the shop early since it was Friday. Mac paid the check, and the guys walked out of the restaurant. Mac offered Jackson a ride, but Jackson said he'd take the subway. Don told he to call them when he made it home so they would know he got home safe. As he walked away, Don turned to Mac and asked: “What happened, Mac?”

“I think he's on to us, Don....”

“How? I behaved myself, and you were nothing but nice to him.....”

“I know, babe...... I really don't know what happened.....”

“Mac, maybe this wasn't such a good idea.....”

“It it, Don..... we'll just have to find another way.....”

 

When Jackson arrived home, he called and left a voice mail for Don. As he was getting ready for bed, he thought about the feeling that came over him at the restaurant. It wasn't exactly a bad feeling, it was like more was expected from him than he was prepared to give. It was weird, but it was something he could live with.

The next morning, Don was waiting outside the shop. Jackson was curious as to why he was there, and Don asked why he had left so suddenly the night before. Jackson started to lie, but the look on Don's face said there was no way he'd believe anything but the truth. Jackson invited him in and fixed them both a cup of coffee.....

“Don, I gotta be honest here..... I felt like there was more expected of me than I could give.....”

“Well, in a way, there was.....”

“What do you mean?”

“Mac's probably gonna kill me for this, but here's the deal: You have feelings for me, Mac has feelings for you, and I'm stuck in the middle because I want both of you!”

“Hold on, Don..... you're saying that both of you have feelings for me? You said you couldn't return my feeling because you were with somebody. Now it's a completely different situation, and Mac wants me, too? What the hell is going on here???”

“Jackson, I couldn't admit how I felt because of Mac. When I found out how he felt, we decided that we both wanted you. Sort of a threesome-type arrangement, only it would be just the three of us and no outsiders. That is if you were agreeable to the arrangement.....”

“And if I wasn't?”

“I honestly don't know.....”

“Don, this is a lot to take in...... I'm gonna need some time to process all of this.....”

“I realize that, Jackson.....”

“Can you give me the time I need to do so?”

“I don't have much choice, do I?”

“Not really...... I'll tell you what, Don..... Let Mac know that you and I have talked, and tell him that I'm not rejecting the two of you, I just need some time.....”

“I'll tell him.....”

“And let him know that I won't leave you hanging.....”

 

Don left Jackson's shop and headed straight to the lab. He found Mac in his office talking to Danny Messer, and when Mac finally noticed Don's agitated state, he asked Danny to give them a moment.....

“What's wrong, Don?”

“I just came from talking to Jackson..... I told him everything.....”

“How did he take it, babe?”

“Surprisingly well...... he was confused, of course, but he wanted me to let you know that he's not rejecting out proposal, he just needs some time to process everything.....”

“That's understandable, considering the circumstances.....”

“But, Mac, what if he doesn't want us?”

“Just take a breath, Don.....”

“He did say he wouldn't leave us hanging.....”

“Well, there you go..... we just have to give him the time he needs, babe.....”

“I hope this all works out, Mac....”

“Just give it some time, Don....”

 

To Be Continued.....


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jackson is plagued with doubts......

Chapter 4:

 

When Jackson got home that evening, he ordered in, opened a bottle of wine, and sat down to review the events of the day. He kept seeing Don's face when he told him about the whole proposal thing. Although he was unsure about the whole thing, there were two things he knew: Don and Mac really wanted this to happen, and Jackson knew it was going to take some soul searching within himself to make his decision. As he lay there waiting for sleep, he wondered if being with Don and Mac was the right thing for him. When sleep claimed him, he was no closer to an answer than he was before.

Don was sitting on the fire escape having a smoke when Mac came to the kitchen window.....

'Are you okay, babe?”

“Not really, Mac.....”

“Still thinking about Jackson?”

“Of course!”

“Don,I told you that this thing will work out. You just gotta give it a little time.....”

“I hope you're right , Mac...... I want this so much.....”

“I know you do, but it's not completely up to us. Jackson has a say in this, and we have to give him a chance to make up his own mind. I'm not saying it it won't be nerve-wracking, but it will work out. Now, why don't you come inside and we make it an early night....”

 

The next morning dawned finding Don in a better mood, Mac his usual self, and Jackson more confused that he was before. Don and Mac went about their normal routine while Jackson sat at home thinking about his situation. What if he got together with them and things went bad. He'd be alone again, and that sure as hell was no fun. There were so many other things he was wondering about, so he decided to call Mac and ask if the three of them could meet so he could express some of his concerns, and maybe get some answers to some of his question. He called the lab and asked for Mac.....

“Taylor.....”

“Mac, this is Jackson.....”

“Hey, guy..... how are you?”

“I'm okay..... Listen, I know you're busy, but I was wondering if it would be possible for the three of us to meet...”

“Is everything alright?”

“Not really, Mac..... I'm really confused and I have so many questions.....”

“It's alright, Jackson..... we will be more than happy to talk with you. When did you want to do this?”

“My schedule is flexible, so whenever is good for you two.....”

“I'll talk with Don and see what we can set up......”

“Mac, this really means a lot that you would take time to do this for me. It helps to know that you guys are willing to help me with making such a big decision.....”

“Think nothing of it, Jackson. One of us will be in touch soon.....”

 

Jackson felt so much better after talking to Mac. The conversation just proved to Jackson that Mac was truly concerned about him and what he thought. After their conversation, Mac called Don and gave him the run-down on his conversation with Jackson. Don agreed that they should talk with Jackson because making a decision of this magnitude must be harder that anything he'd done before. He told Mac that they could clear their schedule over the weekend and devoted some time to Jackson. Mac said that sounded fine to him and said that they could finalized the details later. As fate would have it, later didn't come for nearly three weeks. The day after Mac and Jackson spoke on the phone, a major case broke, and Don and Mac were both very busy. Neither man got a chance to speak to Jackson for nearly three weeks. During that time Jackson fretted and worried and wondered. He tried calling both men but only got voice mail. He only left one message for each man, and not know what was really going on, decided to leave things alone. It hurt, but he figured that the best thing to do would be to go on about his business.

 

Mac and Don were enjoying some time at home. Their part of the case was finished, and they finally had some down time. There was something on Mac's mind, something he'd forgotten, and he couldn't quite remember what it was. Don was doing laundry, and found a folded piece of paper in one on Mac's shirt pockets. It was dated nearly three week before and said something about talking to Jackson. Curious, Don took the note to Mac and asked him about it.....

“Babe, what's this note about?”

“Oh, shit! Jackson called me at the lab and asked if we all could get together and talk. I told him I would set it up. I never got a chance to call him back because of the Clayton case...... I guess I need to call him. He probably thinks I blew the whole thing off.......

“Maybe we should go see him in person. It might ease the sting a little bit.....”

 

Jackson was getting ready to close the shop for the day when Don and Mac walked in. He felt that familiar tingle in his gut, yet considered being cold and hateful. He decided to give them a change to explain.....

“Jackson, we came to apologize for not getting back in touch with you. We had a major break in a case, and things got crazy after that.....”

“I did call and leave messages on both of your phones.....”

“You did?”

Don and Mac both took out their phones and checked their voice mail. Sure enough, there was a message from Jackson on both phones. Don sheepishly looked at Jackson and said: “I'm sorry, babe...”  
Jackson looked sharply at Don, but didn't comment. Don got the message and decided to be quiet after that.....

“Jackson, I feel really bad about all this. I promise we will make it up to you. I know you were trying to deal with issues and had some serious questions when we talked. Let us try and help you, please?”

“Mac, I know that in your line of work that nothing is guaranteed. I'm sure there are missed dates, anniversaries, and a host of other things. I suppose that if I do go through with this I will be setting myself up for these disappointments and a whole lot more. I still have questions and doubts and issues, but I don't know if being with the two of you is really what I need. I'm sorry.......”

“What changed you mind, Jackson?”

“It wasn't just one thing, Don. I suppose my natural insecurity got to me. That coupled with the fact that it was taking us so long to get together and talk all this out. I know that the work thing couldn't be helped, but I really just didn't feel right about it. Don. I really am sorry.....” Don looked at the floor as he listened to what Jackson had to say. It just couldn't end this was. Besides, this was all hid fucking fault for acting like a scared kid when Jackson first came to him. He stood there hoping Mac would speak up and save the day, but that wasn't going to happen. With big tears in his eyes, Don looked directly at Jackson and said: “Please give us another chance.....” Jackson looked away from Don, took a deep breath and asked: “Are you sure?” Both men answered in unison; “YES!” Jackson laughed and said that they still needed to work some things out, and Mac suggested that he come to their apartment as soon as he closed the shop. Jackson told him that he could be there in about 45 minutes.

At the appointed time, Jackson rang the doorbell at Mac's apartment. Don answered the door and asked if he could give Jackson a hug in way of apology. Jackson said that would be okay and found himself wrapped in Don Flack's arms. Jackson had to admit that it felt pretty damn good, but nothing prepared him for the chaste kiss Don gave him. Mac showed up just then and laughingly admonished Don for bothering their guest. Mac asked if he could get Jackson anything, and he asked for a beer. When Mac returned, they three men got comfortable and got down to the matters at hand. Jackson felt comfortable enough to ask the questions he had, and he answered questions that Don and Mac had. He was able to express some of his doubts and Mac and Don were able to make him feel much better. All in all the evening was a success. They all knew each other much better, and as the evening was starting to wind down, Jackson asked Mac a question. Mac said that now they had agree to try and make a go of it, Jackson didn't need his permission to kiss Don. Jackson nervously walked up to Don and almost shyly asked: “May I have a kiss?” Don gave Jackson a kiss he wasn't likely to forget. When it was over, Jackson asked Mac for a kiss. Mac kissed the younger man, and when it was over, Jackson laughed, looked over at Don and said: “You kiss like a bitch!”

The three men laughed and finalized the arrangements for “The Night”. It was decided that Friday night would be the night since Don, Mac, and Jackson had the weekend off. Jackson took his leave soon after, and Don told Mac that he wasn't sure if he could wait until Friday.....

To be continued.....


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5:

 

When Jackson arrived home, it took a long time for sleep to claim him. His mind swirling with thought so what Friday would bring. After the conversation he's had with Don and Mac tonight, he felt a lot better about a lot of things. They answered all of his questions, and really put his mind at ease. Jackson knew that there would be a few bumps in the road, but he figured they would be able to handle it. He was excited about Friday. He would finally get the chance to make love to Don Flack like he'd wanted to in his dreams. Of course, making love to Mac Taylor would be a very nice bonus!

 

Meanwhile, Mac and Don lay in bed talking. They talked of Friday and the upcoming events. Both men were excited at the prospect of making love to their new partner. Don asked Mac about things between them, and Mac did his best to reassure Don that what they had was still as solid as it ever was, and that nothing would change that. He went on to say that they would grow to love Jackson in their own ways, and that he would be an asset to their union. Don told Mac that he felt the same way about Jackson and that as long as he knew that he and Mac would be okay, then everything would be just fine. Mac brought up something that he felt was important, and that was the way they spent time with Jackson. Don said that he didn't understand, and Mac said that they should spend as much time together with Jackson as possible. One on one was fine, so long as it didn't interfere with them as a group. Don thought about it and asked: “So he can be my playmate, or yours, so long as we can have together time?” Mac said that that was exactly what he meant. Sleep finally claimed the two men and they both dreamed of playing around with Jackson.

 

Monday dawned rearing its' ugly head as usual. Don was busy with paperwork, and Mac was busy running the lab. Jackson was busy with the shop, checking in orders and stocking record racks. Around lunch time, Jackson's phone rang. He checked the caller ID and saw Don's name. He smiled and answered:”Hey, you!”

“Hey, yourself! How's things going?”

“As good as can be expected..... how's things with you?”

“Paperwork, and lots of it. I never knew there were so many forms to be filled out for so many things!”

“That's kinda how I feel about filing invoices.... by the way, how's Mac?”

“He's fine..... I talked to him before I spoke with you.....”

“Don, I gotta go.... I got customers.... we'll talk later, yeah?”

“Depend on it!”

Jackson went to wait on his customers while Don continued with his paper work. The rest of the day passed quickly and before he knew it, Jackson was home eating dinner. The rest of the work week passed by quickly, and before anybody realized it, Friday had come. Jackson was extremely nervous, but didn't let that stop him. He showered and dressed carefully for tonight. He wanted to make a good impression, but he didn't really have to worry about that because Don and Mac were already smitten.

While Jackson was making his preparations, Don and Mac were making preparations of their own. Don had gone to the trouble of buying midnight blue silk sheets and was putting them on the bed. Mac had showered and dressed in comfortable sweats and a crisp white t-shirt. Don showered and dressed in dark green lounge pants with a green mesh tank top. Both men looked great! Mac had chilled some wine and had prepared a cheese tray for snacking. There were scented candles lit around the living room and bedroom. Everything was set for an evening of pleasure......

 

Jackson arrived promptly at 8p.m. Don jumped when the doorbell rang and Mac laughed and asked:”Nervous?” Don went to open the door, and whistled appreciatively at Jackson standing there.....

“Hey, babe.....”

“Hey, Don....”

“Come on in, Mac's waiting for us in the living room.....”

On the way to the living room, Don noticed just how short Jackson was. Don stood 6' 2”, Mac stood 5' 11', but Jackson couldn't have stood more that 5' 4”. Mac stooped down to give Jackson a hug and a warm “Hello.....” The three men each had a glass of wine and talked about everything under the sun. After about an hour, Don walked over to the sofa where Jackson was sitting and sat down next to him. Before Jackson could say a word, Don leaned over and kissed him gently. That seemed to ease Jackson's nerves, and he shyly kissed Don back. One thing led to another, and Mac eased his way into the situation. The men made out on the sofa for a while, and then Don suggested they move things to the bedroom.

The three men headed down the hall with Don in the lead. When they reached the bedroom, Jackson suddenly got shy. Mac walked over to him and gently coaxed him into the room. Making hi feel more at ease. Don started things odd by removing his clothes and laying down across the bed. Jackson was in awe at the sight of the man of his fantasies laying there before him. Not to be out-done, Mac stripped and joined Don on the bed. It was almost more that Jackson could handle and he nearly went into sensory overload. Don, sensing what was happening, decided to have Jackson strip and join them That's when things got a bit strange.....

Jackson turned his back and began to undress. When he was naked, he stood with his back to his future lovers until Don asked what was wrong.....

“I'm embarrassed, Don...”

“Jackson, what are you embarrassed about?”

“Mac, I'll show you if you promise not to make a big deal out of it.....”

Don and Mac looked at each other as if to say: “What the hell?” Mac reassured Jackson that a big deal wouldn't be made. Jackson slowly turned around and waited for what may come. Both Don and Mac were shocked into silence for a moment when they saw what caused Jackson's embarrassment. The little guy was hung like a pony!!! Don had the presence of mind to call Jackson over to the bed......

“Baby, may I touch it?”

“Yes....”

“May I, Jackson?”

“Yes.....

Both men touched Jackson's penis in awe..... Neither man had seen an appendage this large up close ever...... With all the touching and attention, Jackson was becoming aroused. He stepped away from the bed, and Mac was instantly by his side.......

“Jax, are you alright?”

“Yes..... I'm sorry for stepping back, I don't mean to tease....”

“Baby, how big does it get?

“It's 8 inches by 6 inches fully hard....”

“Jackson, why are you embarrassed about this?”

“Because guys are afraid of it, and they say I'm a freak.....”

“Stop right there, Jackson.... you are not a freak! I'd be proud to make love to you....”

“Me, too...”

“Well, what are we waiting for.....”

 

The rest of the night passed with loving and connecting. Don, Jackson, and Mac wore themselves out and were completely sated. In the very early morning hours, Jackson sat in the chair by the window watching the patterns of the leaves dancing in the moonlight as it streamed through the window, all the while thinking that he had finally found the love he's always looked for.....

THE END


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